Saturday 10 March 2012

Maybe I Should Have Been an Actress...

As I kid I yearned to be an actress - more for the fame and fortune than for any love of the art.  But just now it occurred to me that I feel like I am playing a character:
woman, early thirties, slim, athletic.

The first one is true: "woman".  The second, "early thirties", is a stretch but apparently the weight-loss has taken 'years off me' (I'm really late-thirties).  The final two are so far from my self-image and the pre-loss-me that they seem a joke!  I must have a very elaborate make-up team that have made me look this way, "slim, athletic".  Slim with some sort of body costume like when they made Courteney Cox in Friends look obese.  And the athletic bit, it's like I have muscle definition painted on to me like those t-shirts with a painted on stomach of six-pack-abs.

I am playing this character as a 'method-actor' would: living the life of this woman.  I dress in flattering, colourful, playful clothes.  I wear my hair long and often tied up on top of my head, like a dancer, I was told.  I wear make-up.  I run three times a week, that's just what I do.  I wear nice shoes (because I'm not always worried about sore feet).  I laugh a lot.

So, will I become this woman?  I don't mean to imply that I believe I will become younger!  But will I become so comfortable in this costume that it will feel like 'me' and I will lose my association to the 'me' that is still in my head?r

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